My entertainment center consists of a small 12′ TV with a built-in VCR. I have found all the titles I needed at the thrift stores. Since the quality of major motion pictures has steadily declined since the 1950’s, I find all the jewels I need in the $1 bin.
My favorites have been Dr. Zhivago and this, The Greatest Story Ever Told. It is beautifully shot, filmed and acted. There is entrance and exit music (which I love) and the man who plays Jesus does so quite brilliantly, with no signs of any tongue-in-cheek mockery. It is a great film, as is Dr. Zhivago. How terrible that all the untold means and ability now are wasted on big-name actors and CGI explosions. A sign of the times, alas.
These are not my times.
I have so many “how can this be” moments that frustrate and bewilder me. So I have determined to either change or leave this place soon. Not that I am at all suicidal, quite the opposite. I am living for others, what more meaning could a life have? Maybe that’s how my shadows feel. That they are living for others, so their work has meaning. Whatever the case, when you live for others your life is not your own nor yours to take. So, that settles that.
‘”When you see a cloud rising in the west, immediately you say, ‘A shower is coming,’ and so it turns out. “And when you see a south wind blowing, you say, ‘It will be a hot day,’ and it turns out that way. “You hypocrites! You know how to analyze the appearance of the earth and the sky, but why do you not analyze this present time?’
I do not understand, speaking only for myself, how the devil can thrive so rampantly and no one actually sees. It took me actually encountering Satan to wake me up and even then, I had moments where I lulled back into sleep. What is this miasma that keeps us all asleep and apart or undead?
‘Satan, who is the god of this world, has blinded the minds of unbelievers. They are unable to see the glorious light of the gospel. They don’t understand this message about the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.’
Ah, it is Satan. This is his world and ‘I am a stranger on earth.’ It all makes sense now. Even my shadows. I will no longer be surprised by wickedness or evil or chaos. This is your world, that is apparent.
‘What we preach is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who said, “Let light shine out of the darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory.’
‘This all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.’
So let them say what they want. I know I am ripe fodder for gossip. I just pray that my name being smeared and spread like wildfire might lead one sleeping lamb here, to my open journal and they might realize their potential. Then all that I’ve been through I would do 100 times over. But, fortunately, I won’t have to. For, come hell or high water, this little one is going home.